People who have suffered trauma often struggle to define themselves. They may not want the label Victim and instead prefer to be described as survivors. This is not to say that they don’t still experience the symptoms of victimhood. For example, they might feel powerless to change their circumstances or that other people are to blame. However, the label survivor carries a more positive connotation and suggests that they are moving on from their trauma rather than just surviving it.

In this article we explore the complexities of the term Victim and discuss how it is related to self sabotage, negative thinking patterns, and the ability to overcome adversity. For some people, staying in Victim mode can be very comfortable because they avoid taking risks and show vulnerability. However, staying a victim can short sell your potential and happiness in the long run. It is also a vicious cycle because there is a powerful payoff to identifying as a victim which may be hidden or unconscious.

The most obvious payoff is the sense of personal validation that you get from others when they express their sympathy for your situation. For this reason, it is hard for victims to admit that they may not be as strong or as resilient as they would like to think.

Additionally, research has shown that signaling victimhood can lead to narcissism, Machiavellianism (the tendency to manipulate and exploit others for your own benefit), a sense of entitlement, and lower levels of honesty and humility. These traits can be harmful to your career and relationships in general and also impede on growth.